Credit: Netflix / Katarina Marchinowski

Everybody, shut up and clear the damn red carpet, because Nobody Wants This has crowned its new romantic royalty, and Joanne and Noah might want to start packing up their bags. Yes, people, Morgan and Sasha have hijacked the entire third season of this Netflix rom-com, and they’re not even the central couple. Please, don’t get us wrong; nobody is complaining. If anything, we’re obsessed.

Kristen Bell and Adam Brody spent two seasons convincing us that Joanne and Noah were the pinnacle of television romance, only for Justine Lupe and Timothy Simons to make their romantic monopoly look thin as a rake. All that emotional investment, and now the supporting cast is running the love department.

And the most outrageous part of this romantic tomfoolery is that Morgan and Sasha have spent ages pretending they are nothing but friends when the sexual tension between them was as clear as day. Honey, nobody’s buying that friendship excuse anymore, so spare everyone the performance and admit what’s going on, which they finally did in this season of Nobody Wants This.

Then season three sends these two off to New York, and kudos to the makers who had an entire rom-com materialise out of nowhere! That dress-shopping escapade before Morgan’s television appearance was pure cinematic gold.

And the chemistry! For crying out loud, these two could make an argument about absolutely nothing sound romantic, and watching Sasha support Morgan gave everybody butterflies they never expected, at least from these two. Joanne and Noah, sweethearts, your competition is getting out of hand.

Then comes the hotel-room encounter, and after all that unbearable yearning, the writers gave them their long-overdue romantic breakthrough. Hallelujah!

But hold the celebrations, because Morgan wakes up and does a run! Girl. Are you serious? The man has spent the trip being an absolute sweetheart, and you’ve decided that fleeing the scene is the sensible response?

And Sasha, Sir, come on, rejecting Morgan when she confesses her feelings before ending up in Esther’s bed is an astonishing piece of romantic skulduggery. Granted, Morgan hurt him, but returning to his estranged wife while he turned down the woman he had a crush on since forever… Of course nobody wants this.

The infuriating thing is that Morgan and Sasha understand each other better than either cares to admit, yet they’ve made a fiasco out of a relationship that has spent seasons begging to happen. Joanne and Noah have earned their romantic security, but these two have given the showmakers enough material to spice up the next season of Nobody Wants This.

So, Netflix, consider this a formal complaint. After giving Morgan and Sasha their own New York rom-com, another season of romantic dithering would be unforgivable. These two have stolen the spotlight, and now their love story deserves a future, and please, spare the excuses next time.